I fought the law

Kathleen Parker, a deeply empathetic person, puts herself in the shoes of the typical illegal immigrant:

>As long as we offer jobs, medical treatment, driver’s licenses and in-state tuition to those who come here illegally, why would any right-thinking, would-be immigrant take a number and wait his or her turn? Why not just throw in the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders and free tequila while we’re at it?

Indeed, the life of the typical illegal immigrant is full of all sorts of freebies; indeed, the only thing missing is the fulfillment of some kind of alcohol-fueled male adolescent sexual fantasy.

It gets worse:

>Arguments favoring services and privileges for illegal immigrants always point to the broader benefits to society.

God forbid.

>Healthy immigrants mean a healthier America; an educated populace means fewer jobless dependents; legal drivers are more responsible because, allegedly, they’ll also buy insurance and stick around when they have an accident.

>The latter seems unconvincing given that illegal immigrants, by definition, tend not to think legally.

A bachelor, by definition, is an unmarried man. An illegal immigrant, by definition, is someone who does not have legal status; but this actually doesn’t mean that this illegal immigrant has broken the law. The law might have been broken–as it is in numerous cases–when they were children. Besides, it’s not the case that anyone who breaks the law, in any regard, “tends to think illegally.” I’d be interested to find out what the thinking illegally tendency is.

She continues:

>In any case, by the same logic, we might also say that amnesty is good for the country because then everyone would be legal. Rather than fix something, we simply accommodate circumstances. As in: Kids are having sex anyway, so we’ll just give them condoms.

Parker suggests that the response to every problem is the same: stop it. While that might be desirable, as any sociologist could tell you, it’s not going to happen. Denying the reality and complexity of illegal immigration will not achieve much, however much you assert that illegal is as illegal does.

3 thoughts on “I fought the law”

  1. “Kids are having sex anyway, so well just give them condoms.”
    Heh. I love when these folks treat perfectly reasonable policies as if they were truly despicable…
    I wonder if she spends weekends crusading to keep those nefarious condoms out of the, ahem, hands of our children.

  2. But if it’s not an abstinence program, then it’s affirmatively pro-sex!!!! See the updated link for recent research on that question. Thanks, as always, for the comment.

  3. “why would any right-thinking, would-be immigrant take a number and wait his or her turn?”

    Obvious, illegal immigrants are not only immoral, but lack even the capacity to be moral! Or is this a window into the author’s moral code: “I do the right thing because it’s convenient” perhaps? Maybe I should look into simply buying my PhD. online, what right-thinking student wouldn’t go to a diploma mill?

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